My mother has dementia
Good Morning:)
I didn't know that I had to check back to the Forum for answers. I am sorry about that
I did not find my name there but that's okay. I now know where I have to go for answers.
I want to know about my responsibility as my mother's daughter on her well being. It's on my mind all the time. For an example, drinking water to keep her body from dehydrating and eating wholesome foods to keep her healthier.
She is not responding to drinking water or eating. This really concerns me.
She is still able to get up and move around, so far.
What do I do?
Thank you
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Hi Linda,
I am SO glad you found your way to these forums and hope you can gain some insight as you peruse all of the information offered.
May I suggest that you contact your local Alzheimers Association; if you are unable to locate a phone number in the phone book, you can likely a health clinic or hospital located in your town/city and get phone number/other information from them. It's important for you to have a local contact to help guide you locally, so you can better help your mom.
When you do contact the above, also ask about any local caregiver support groups, where family who have loved ones with Alzheimers or other debilitating issues can receive not only support, but also receive guidance in the areas with which you are now struggling. My husband and I gained a wealth of information while we attended such support groups.
Please post often so we can offer more as you need it.
suzer
2/22/2012 Hi Linda,
Thank you for the additional information on your Mother.
#1 -- Unless you are a trained professional in the field of dementia, I personally would not recommend your trying to diagnosis what type of dementia your Mother has. Even doctors who are trained and have experience with different dementia have trouble sometimes determining the type of dementia. But, maybe her doctor has reasons for not giving a dementia diagnosis.
#2 -- My best friend's father died with Lewy Body dementia. If it has been about 8 years since you first thought of LBD and your Mother has not needed medications or started showing certain behaviors, I wonder if she actually has Lewy Body Dementia. The following is some information from the Alzheimer's Association website on LBD:
http://www.alz.org/alzheimers_disease_dementia_with_lewy_bodies.asp
#3 -- If the person has a type of dementia, it is very important to try and get a definite diagnosis. Especially if it is early on in the disease. For example, if a person has Alzheimer's certain behavior changes will appear as the disease progresses. There are medications that can help the person. The following are two other articles that may help you. One covers diagnosis of Alzheimer's and the other about other types of dementia.
http://www.alz.org/alzheimers_disease_diagnosis.asp
The other is www.alz.org/alzheimers_disease_related_diseases.asp
#4 -- Have you read "The 36-Hour Day", 5th edition? One of the co-authors is Dr. Peter Rabins who is internationally known for his work with Alzheimer's disease. This books pretty well covers most things a person may want to know about the disease.
#5 --- As far as eating and drinking fluids, have you tried Ensure to supplement that your Mother is eating less foods? For fluids, have you tried fruit juices rather than just plain water especially if you can find some that have a slight sweet taste? My Mom is in a private care home. The couple that run it take fresh fruits and put them into a blender with a little honey and maybe some yogurt. It is a very tasty drink and the honey adds just a little sweetness.
#6 --- Bathing and changing clothes can sometimes become important issues. Have you tried making up excuses/reasons why your Mother needs to change clothes? It it works, do it on a daily basis and see if she continues to cooperate.
#7 -- Concerning the Community for the Aging and a definition of "dire" straights. If it were me, I would keep after them until someone defined just what requirements are needed for "dire straights" to apply. I am not the type of person to sit back and try to guess when my Mom would arrive at a certain place in time to meet their requirements. As far as I am concerned, any good worthwhile agency has rules and regulations for providing services. Someone should then be able to explain those to me.
Well, this is getting longer than I intended. Please let us know how things are going.
Nancy
2/25/2012 Hi Linda,
Glad to hear you have plans in the works to help your Mother. Wish you the very best in helping her, your Dad, and yourself.
Just a Hint: Based on my experiences with certain "management types", you sometimes need to keep reminding them you are still around. Know you will do just fine.
As far as determining what type of dementia your Mother has, depending on where she is in the process, it may not be a necessary thing in helping her. In the early stages it can be important to know. But, once the dementia progresses to a certain point and is under control, then maybe the diagnosis is not that important. That is just my person opinion.
Glad to hear to have attended some Alzheimer's support groups. Do you know that they have a hotline to call that is available 24/7? I have never used it.
You welcome. Always glad if I can in anyway help.
Nancy
2/22/2012 Welcome back,
Since I missed your earlier posting, can you give some background on your Mother? If you added your other posting onto someone else's, then it may be a challenge to find it again. Now that you have established a separate Thread just for your Mother's story, hopefully you will find the information you are looking for.
What type of dementia does your Mother have? How long has she had it? What types of behavior is she showing (eating less, sleeping more, agitation, etc)?
You mention that your Mother is not eating or drinking. If a person is in the very final stages of the dementia or very close to it, their body may be shutting down. When this happens, the person may reduce their food and water intake.
Have you had her doctor check your Mother to make sure there is no other health issue causing her to not want to eat or drink? For example: if a person has problems with their teeth or gums, bad fitting dentures, or sores in their mouth, that could affect how they eat and/or drink liquids.
My Mom is 89 and in the final stages of Alzheimer's. I have been making all of her financial and medical care decisions for 6 years now. My goal is to keep Mom as healthy as possible within her Alzheimer's disease and to provide comfort care for her.
Anytime you see a change in your Mother's behavior, please contact her doctor. Changes may mean there is a change in the dementia progression or some other health issue has popped up. This is why the doctor needs to be kept in the loop of things happening in your Mother's life.
Look forward to hearing from you.
Nancy