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Support & Insight for the Autumn of Life

Why Visit When Memory is Gone


Dementia-Friends-Champion Natalie talks through the ‘bookcase analogy’. Understand the way dementia affects a person and why visits are so important to them.


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April 25, 2017 2:53 pm

Thank you for explaining that to us. I am getting to that point of why do I visit when he doesn't remember me being there? Thank you!

April 27, 2017 6:11 pm

This is so true. The nurses at my husbands health care center tell me that my visits every day is stimulation for him, even though he doesn't know me & is what is keeping him alive. He has been in Advanced stages now for almost 3 years.

My husband has been in the Advanced stages of Alzheimers for almost 3 years. He doesn't know me & is completely immobile. But the nurses at his Nursing Home say that me going every day is stimulation for him & that is what is keeping him alive. He doesn't know me but I KNOW HIM.

Reply to  Unknown
April 27, 2017 6:14 pm

Sorry this didn't publish the first time, so is why it is repeated.

Reply to  Unknown
April 27, 2017 11:01 pm

I visited with Dad today, he was resting on his bed, and he said "Who are you?" I told him who I was and he said do you work here? I said No, I'm your daughter! He looked at me and said "Oh ya, that's right, your the dentist! I am a retired Dental Hygienist! So he finally did remember me. I got him up and put his slippers on, and the nurse came and got him in his wheel chair, and I wheeled him to the dining room for lunch. I was going to go and he said Don't rush off, stay and visit! So I did! Turned into a good day!

December 15, 2017 1:29 pm

visits are good, all visits, as often as you can, you will receive the benefit too, some make you cry, some make smiles, you will want to go back asap

December 24, 2017 8:54 am

It's very odd/amazing how the brain can compartmentalize things. My father can't remember what he just ate an hour ago, but is absolutely positive he has taken showers everyday or even up to 2 times a day he claims, when it's such a issue for him I only can manage to actually get him to take 2 a week.

February 21, 2020 6:37 pm

Thank you so much for this wonderful explanation!

October 4, 2023 12:43 pm

I visited my mum every week, for over 3yrs. I don’t know if she knew me in the end. But I do know she really enjoyed me being there with her,holding her hand, talking to her even when she lost the ability to talk to me. I lost my mum this year all I can say is keep visiting your love one I would do it again it a heartbeat.

B. Berger

B. Berger

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This site was inspired by my Mom’s autoimmune dementia.

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